The P.M. in a smokescreen

Prime Minister Jim Hacker was a non-smoker, so he tended to agree with his Minister of State for Health, Dr. Peter Thorn, that the U.K. government should take drastic legislative steps against the tobacco industry. His proposals included a ban on cigarette advertising, a ban on smoking in public places, and a massive advertising campaign to publicize the harmful effects of smoking. Tobacco consumption, however, brought in over �4 billion annually in tax revenue to the Treasury, so government officials-including Cabinet Secretary Sir Humphrey Appleby - were not in favour of such a crackdown, as the following extract from Hacker's diary makes clear.

MAY 11 - After Dr. Thorn informed me last week that 300 British citizens die every day - 100,000 a year-from the effects of smoking, I encouraged him to go public with his attacks on the tobacco industry and his anti-smoking recommendations.

Humphrey came in to see me this morning. He seemed very tense. He had heard Dr. Thorn on the BBC saying that he thought the government should take strong action to curb and eventually eliminate smoking.

"And how does he expect us to achieve this?" he asked derisively. "A campaign of mass hypnosis, perhaps?"

I leaned back in my chair and smiled confidently at him.

"No. By raising taxes on tobacco sky high and prohibiting all cigarette advertising. Don't you think that his position is admirably moral?"

He was as superior as only Humphrey could be. "Moral, perhaps, but extremely silly. No one in their right mind could seriously contemplate such a proposal."

"I'm contemplating it," I said.

"Yes, of course," he replied without a moment's hesitation, the patronizing smile wiped instantly from his face. "Don't misunderstand me, Prime Minister; of course it's right to contemplate all proposals that come from your government, but no sane person could ever support it."

"I'm supporting it," I said.

"And quite right, too, Prime Minister, if I may say so." His footwork is so fast that one might be forgiven for not noticing that he totally reversed his opinion with each sentence he uttered.

I gave him the chance to come over to my side. "So you'll support it, too?" I asked.

"Support it?" he was emphatic. "I support it wholeheartedly! A splendid, novel, romantic, wellmeaning, imaginative, do-gooding notion."

As I thought. He is totally against it!

-From The Complete Yes Prime Minister, BBC, edited by Jonathan Lynn and Antony Jay.